I saw the movie, August: Osage County, and really enjoyed the way they portrayed the complicated relationships between parents and children. Relationships that unfold like a repeated story, as mothers and fathers parent the way we are taught by our parents and how we are raised, regardless of whether it was good or bad. I won’t get into a movie review as you can find plenty of those online, but I will say that observing the matriarch of that family (actress Meryl Streep) along with her sister and the relationships they had with their children was enlightening. We learn as we age, the older the wiser and I believe that more with every passing year. But sometimes, someone helps us to see by opening our eyes, forcing us to look within. There is still so much I do not know about parenting and yet so much I know now than I did a decade ago. I don’t want to have a bad relationship with my children. I do not want to encourage them by discouraging them. I want to be different, I want to break the cycle. I do not want to treat them the only way I know how, I want to be better.
In this technologically advanced time, we have internet and blogs that mothers can reference to cross reference what other moms are doing. We compare ourselves and wonder if we are doing it right. But each mother, is different, each child is different and we must all find our own right ways. None of us are perfect, but we can certainly try to be the best for our kids. As they grow, they will know, they will see, that we did what we had to do, even if they didn’t like it. I am tough because I have to be and want them to learn the life lessons I try to teach them. I am weak, because I am human and I may not always be right. I want my kids to know that they can do anything, be anything but I will also let them know why something may not sound like a good idea, or why something may not turn out how they think it will. Communication is key, let’s talk to our kids like we talk to one another. Be open and let them feel your unconditional love. Unconditional in the sense that it doesn’t matter if they fail, it matters if they get up again. It doesn’t matter if they failed a test, as long as you know they did their best, it doesn’t matter that they lost a game, or missed a shot, what matters is that they try and try again. Success will come, in different forms. I love you Daniel and I love you Addison. I want to be better for you, I want you to know that I am trying to evolve and be the best that I can be for you.
So true! I always teach my son, when he does something I don’t appreciate, that I love him but I don’t like what he did! It’s important to explain the difference to your children!
Very true Claudia. Very true.
All family dynamics are complicated and I’d love to see the movie because I think Meryl/Julia on screen together is amazing.
Like you, I want a closer relationship with my son as he gets older – than the one I have with my Mom. There are things I feel like she’ll judge me for. I want him to be open to discuss anything with me & my husband.
I hear you Joyce, sounds like we both struggle with same issues. I hope my kids discuss any and everything with me too.
Very sweet and insightful post. BB suggests you print this out during their ::shudder:: PUBERTY. Motherlove will still be around, but you’ll have to remind yourself. ; ) BB2U
Great idea BB. I will make sure I show them these posts 🙂